Sorry sweetheart. You are going first because you just aren't that important anymore........and after reading the entire story you will see that you never really were.........the only special thing about you was who you represented to me in my mind. Ready or not.......Round 1: DING DING
"Being in control of your life and having realistic expectations about your day-to-day challenges are the keys to stress management, which is perhaps the most important ingredient to living a happy, healthy and rewarding life."
~Marilu Henner~
After reading this story you will see that I failed to follow the advice above.
I met the Fourteenth Street Whore very soon after she graduated high school. The ironic part about the entire story is that I am pretty sure myself, Marcelle, and Marlow were the first people in RVA she met when arriving here. She was moving to RVA to go to VCU and needed a job. Her high school background was with the Y, so she emailed all the Y Directors (and I know some of you are reading this right now) and I happened to be the first one who responded. I used to get emails like hers all the time. The only reason I even responded to hers on that particular day was that I had just lost a guard to another pool and needed a replacement..........I still wonder to this day what my life would be like had I never responded to that email. Funny how the smallest decisions can lead to the biggest life changes...................Anyway, she met me at the coffee shop down the street from my house for an interview one summer day in 2010, and I had walked to the interview with my family, so she and Marcelle looked each other in the eyes and shook hands..........ohhhh, how times have changed since that day.
The FSW and I worked well together, and it was obvious from the very beginning that I needed to be careful around her, so I was. I handled myself very professionally, despite the obvious crush that she was quickly developing. When Marcelle crossed paths with her again at a Y event, she came to me in private afterwards and said, 'I don't like the way that girl looks at you. Watch your back around her."........It amazes me how quickly other women pick up on things about other women. I was clueless to the fact the FSW was constantly flirting with me.........but then again, I have no game what-so-ever.
"It is not enough to be well-intentioned; one must strive to put those intentions into action in a capable way. One must consider the effect his actions will have on others. Looked at like this, to persist in ignorance is itself dishonorable."
~Andrew Cohen~
As the year progressed the Fourteenth Street Whore became an outstanding employee professionally. She was, and still is smart as hell, motivated, organized, caring and charismatic........it was just that she was a train wreck of an employee personally. I dealt with emotional breakdowns during her shifts, inappropriate communications outside of work, arguments with other employees over the stupidest shit imaginable........basically she turned the Aquatics Department of the Petersburg Y into her own little version of the Real World.........but she was attractive, and when it comes to attractive, sweet women, I am a pathetically passive human being, so I blew all of it off as not being that important and failed to do my job...........but I am not going to lie, she intrigued me. I just couldn't figure out why.
In the early Fall of 2010 she came to me crying one day and said she was homesick and was considering transferring. I told her to hold off. Then I sat her down at my desk to get a hold of herself and found the one thing that always helped me relax..........kayaking videos. :) I pretty much had her hooked within five minutes of watching. Now, here is where I fucked up Big Time........I agreed to teach her myself, and because I knew Marcelle would flip out, I hid it from her..........yep. Pretty fucking stupid. (My intentions here were innocent and solely based on one thing. I wanted to teach kayaking to anyone.....and I mean anyone. But true boaters either have it or they don't. And the fact was, she had it and I knew it, so I wanted to be the one to teach her..............funny, I remember feeling the same way about another girl at one point in my life, but we will come back around to that.
It was later in the Fall that I realized just how much trouble I was in. Marcelle was traveling to CVille almost every other weekend with the boys and always wanted me to go.........this was not working well for us or our marriage, but I will explain that later. With Marcelle gone all the time, the FSW's job was made that much easier with me. On Halloween she showed up at my back door (oh yea.....she lived two blocks from us. You could almost see her house from ours) in a trench coat. When she dropped the trench coat she was wearing a burlesque outfit........yea. I am still shocked she was wearing it, and no, nothing happened. Funny thing is, after leaving my house she went to a public bar, apparently danced around in it all night, and actually created problems with the bar because guys were trying to grab her. (when you present yourself as a whore, you are treated like a whore) I should have seen all of this as bizarre behavior, but instead I let it roll right off my back.....plus I was in denial about the seriousness of what happened because I ended up alone in my living room with a half naked eighteen year old employee. I figured she could have said anything she wanted to after that and I would have no way of defending myself, plus there is no way anyone would ever believe me........just like how y'all just read the sentence "there was a half naked eighteen year old swim coach in my living room and nothing happened", and responded with a big 'yea, whatever Justin.' See, no way to defend myself........and the time eventually did come when she blackmailed me, but we shall get to that later.
“The bonds of friendship dwindle with age, Oliver. But a little blackmail lasts forever.”
~Stephen Hunt, The Court of the Air~
By the next spring the FSW had fully dug her claws into me and I was finding myself in hotter and hotter water all the time. First she wanted the head coaching job of the swim team, but I went with someone else who had a lot more experience and professionalism. I told her that it was important for her to take a year and learn from others before taking on a leadership role herself. Basically, she was too young, and I knew it...............this decision did not go over well. The head coach did an amazing job helping to grow and train the team, as well as taking on the additional responsibility of training what I saw to be an up and coming swim coach. It was a perfect set up because the head coach would only be there for an agreed one year before returning to another team. It couldn't have worked out better...........until the train wreck came. I ended up playing referee all season long, dealing with emotional breakdowns, bull shit drama, and stress. Lots of it. Worst of all, I was now trapped. Because of my stupid ass decision to train her to kayak in secret, I was now constantly worried about what she could pin on me, say about me, etc. I had given a crazy ass 18 year old girl full power over the outcome of my life.........and I lived with this fear for over two years. It sucked.........a lot! But it was my fault and I deserved all of it.
By the end of the season the FSW was holding onto her job by a string, but then she decided to put a nail in her coffin. She sent threatening text messages to the head coach...........well, that pretty much sealed her fate as a swim coach. Even if I had wanted to back her up, I couldn't. She fucked herself, and she knew it. I was simply heartbroken at the fact that I had created a perfect set up for an outstanding swim team with a coach who was young, available for the next six years, and LOVED the Petersburg Swim Team (and she did love what she did. I never once doubted that. I know you are reading this and know how much that team meant to you. I blame myself. My lack of responsible management is what lead to your downfall within the Y organization. I put too much trust in you, and for that I am sorry.) So in the end, she was canned and I was left with a swim team that lacked the leadership I promised.........however I figured the new situation would at least help create some space between her and I........boy was I wrong about that one.
Kayaking lessons became more and more frequent, plus I made a few calls and found her a job within an organization at VCU....... ........yep, you guessed it. The VCU OAP program, which contained half the social network that I had in my life at the time. I had friends who worked for them, were alumni, students, friends, friends of friends, etc., etc., etc. Basically I placed her right in the middle of my entire social life on the water, which at the time was my entire social life.........period...........this was surely about to become a problem, and boy did it ever!......stay tuned......because I haven't even begun to REALLY fuck up yet in this story.
"The game is my wife. It demands loyalty and responsibility, and it gives me back fulfillment and peace."
~Michael Jordan~
Sorry Celle. I didn't understand what Jordan meant until it was too late. See ya on the rivah.........hopefully teachin' a dude. PEACE
Additionally ~ The things I did to help the FSW were not done because I had secret motives to try and sleep with her. I was well aware that I had the ability to sleep with her at any time. She made that quite obvious from the beginning. I just chose not to. The things I did for her were done because I cared, about her, and every other employee that I managed. There were other employees there that came to me for help, or for kayaking, or just to talk, and I was always there for all of them. I just wanted to make sure they were all taken care of, and just wanted to see her happy. Those truly were my original intentions.....so with that said, it really sucks how it all ended.
